5 Ways This B2B Industrial Trade Publication Ad Could Be Better

This ad, which was run in an industrial trade publication leaves a lot off the table. The company that ran it invested a fairly large amount of money for a full page ad. Unfortunately, they have wasted their space. Here are 5 ways this ad could have been better.

Print ad critique , B2B industrial Advertiser

Click Here to Add a Title

1. Headline. This headline: "Mold Handling Systems" is pretty bland. While it does make clear the subject of the ad, it doesn't give the reader (who has already seen half-a-dozen other mold handling system ads) a good reason to read the body copy. A better option would be to include the main benefit of this particular mold handling system. Maybe something like this:

"Tough, Low-Maintenance, Custom Fit Mold Handling System."


"A Mold Handling System So Tough & Easy to Maintain, You Might Just Forget You Have It."

2, Photo Quality. It's tough to tell what's going on in this photo. The lack of clarity and focus sends the message that this advertiser is behind technology, not leading in it. Make sure your photo or image relates to the reader and what you offer in a way that conveys your capabilities.

3. Subhead. This subhead is not very strong. It sounds like jargon, in fact. There is a line at the end of the second paragraph of copy that would make a better subhead: "Move your production to new levels of efficiency and cost effectiveness." Something with the main benefit or two as the focus.

4. Body copy. Again, this body copy sounds like jargon. Fluff. Things that could be said of almost any mold handling system. Body copy should begin to build the case as to why the reader should choose to contact you. Why you're capable, trustworthy, proven.

5. Call to action. It's good that there is a call to action at the end of this ad, but this one could be better. It says: "Call 000-000-0000 and talk to one of our experienced engineers., or go online and visit us at www.oooooooooo.com. You will be glad you did." This leaves the reader wondering... "What will I talk about with one of your engineers? What info will the engineer be asking for? Will I be pressured in any way?" among other things. 

Response rates increase when advertisers tell readers exactly what they want them to do. For example, "Call for a free project guide." or "Call for a free assessment of your project." To say "Go online... visit... www...." is not necessary. Simply include the web address with no www. necessary. And offer a free guide, report, etc. for doing so. 

Click this text to start editing. This simple title and text block is great for welcome or explanatory text. When writing, try to keep things down to a few lines at a time. Break up your content into different blocks to keep your page interesting.